Jun 28, 2011

417. Get My Party On


Before James left, he informed me that he intended to find a bride back in Switzerland as soon as possible and start breeding.  I wished him good luck, which is exactly what he needs.

I can just see 10 years down the road, he will have to pay a huge amount of alimony and child support, for the wife he has never truly loved and the children he hardly has time to see.

Many men want children almost as badly as women. And they want their OWN children, which is a bit egoistic, I think.

Don’t get me wrong, I love children. I’m a magnet with kids everywhere I go (not only with men, mind you). Somehow they just know I will play with them (not applicable to men, hopefully!) But the thing is, I’ve never been very maternal. I don’t think it’s fair to bring another life to this world, while I have lost faith in it myself long ago.

Of course I understand it’s probably the most beautiful experience anyone could possibly have. But I always think one day if I suddenly have the compelling urge to breed, I might just adopt a child. There are too many orphans out there already!

Or, if I really fall in love one day, head over heels with a man who makes me lose any reasoning power I've ever possessed, and I start dreaming about having his baby. Well, maybe then...

James’ approach on breeding is rather courageous, which reminds me of the ancient wisdom of arranged marriages.

I am sure after you learn to compromise, you will finally feel content, but will you be happy though? Love comes in many different forms, you can argue it is love after all, when 2 strangers learn to care for each other deeply enough to tolerate each other’s existence day in and day out.

And when they have children, well yes, they might become actually happy then, from watching their children growing up, but NOT from actively ignoring each other with secret resentment.

Arranged marriages worked before only because people didn’t have too many options. So after the children went to college, they stayed together and tried to find peace, separately.

But nowadays things are very different. After the children leave home, it’s time to say good-bye to their empty nest and divide whatever they have, like all the modern marriages now. In fact, most can’t even wait till all the children go to college!

So why don’t we just forget about the 0.7 child, the 30% paid mortgage and the 99% chance of divorce, and get the party on!